Daily Mindful Erotic Practice
I’m going to tell you what I did this morning. Waking up, I immediately thought about the fact that during the holidays my mindful erotic practice had fallen off a bit and I needed to do something to awaken my Erotic Body. I needed to recognize that my body needs to be touched, held, stroked, massaged…and that I need to do this every day. But I was in that groggy state of not quite being awake, not quite being asleep. I wasn’t fully conscious yet. So, I allowed my hands to go spontaneously to my body and just experience them finding a place on my body to get things started.
My left hand seemed to want to do the job, so I let it wander, eventually realizing that its target was my perineum, my ‘taint’, right below my balls. My fingertips began massaging the area, bringing gentle pressure. Eventually my hand stopped massaging and simply held the pressure there while I breathed into the gentle touch.
As I breathed, I felt my body awaken. There was nothing dramatic, no surging desire to masturbate, no stroking of any other part of my genitals. It was just that gentle, slight pressure and I continued to breathe into it, noticing whatever came up. What I noticed was a sense of comfort, of being ‘held’, of grounding, and of gentle erotic energy beginning to enter my lower body. (Yes, erotic energy can be gentle!) I knew that my only job was to go into the pleasure and simply notice it. Nothing else was required. At around 4 minutes in, I received a little contraction in my PC muscles, just like those contractions that come with orgasm/ejaculation but with a whisper, not a shout. It was delicious, a kind of mini orgasm that felt like my body was responding with joy to this tiny moment of pleasurable touch.
While all this was happening, I noticed that my right hand had moved up to my heart. Again, there was no massaging or movement of any kind. It was just a spontaneous recognition that my body desires to be at one with itself, to connect heart and cock, heart and pelvis, and to celebrate that experience.
Was this a mindful erotic practice? You bet it was! It was less than 6 or 7 minutes, but it was amazingly meaningful to me for the rest of the day and fulfilled what I think is the purpose of the practice: to connect with Erotic Energy so that I can be fully embodied for the day and ready to use that energy to engage with the people that I’ll see. A lot of folks think that a mindful erotic practice must involve a full-on masturbation session with getting the whole body involved, stroking, edging, finishing in a climax, and spending significant time in the savoring stage (“afterglow”). Nope. I mean, when I have the time and energy for it, that’s exactly what I would want to do! But it also can be experienced simply as holding, gently touching or massage, anything that can bring a sense of waking up your erotic energy. And it can be for as short or as long a time as you want. If you achieve a state of blissful connection with your body…no matter how long or short the time spent…then a mindful erotic practice has occurred. It’s so simple. And yet so profound.